I see two positive sea changes in our community.

The first is that we're seeing people come out, finally, and name abuse. This is a vital first step and I'm thrilled that we have it in place. Without mentioning anyone specifically, it's clear that abuse has been going on under …

I'm heartened to see the public outcry about the abuses that were done by people like SN and EP in the NYC area. Speaking out against the kinds of abuse is an important first step into changing the culture that allowed these things to happen. But there's something else that …

When I first met some of the people who are now accused of abuse, I thought they had the kink relationship of my dreams. They had multiple slaves working long hard hours, devoted to them, playing with them, handing over power and authority to them, encouraging their dreams and helping …

As a child of the 80s, I grew up playing Pac-Man and defeating Pac-Man's four ghost foes: Blinky, Pinky, Inky and Clyde.

Many of us are familiar with the kind of ghosting where a person you're in touch with disappears, there's another kind of ghosting- the Blinky kind.

In Blinky …

Gentlemen, listen up. I've done the work for you. As some of you know, I used to run a sex chat website called STC. I also use other chat platforms, and on those platforms, I hear from women how frustated they are at dealing with men. So sometimes I go …

There are many sentiments on Fetlife that being a dominant means that it shouldn't all be about the dominant- that sometimes it should be about the submissive and their needs.

And of course this is true; any relationship where one party thinks nothing of the other party's well being is …

I've been a fan of Al Franken for decades. I first became aware of him through his work on SNL in the 90s, and his Stuart Smalley character. I soon learned that he was a writer there and was part of other amazing work I'd enjoyed.

Then, in the early …

For thirty-seven years, I've called the United States my home. I wasn't born here and as a dual citizen, I've always had the opportunity to leave. As time has gone on, I've considered doing so, and that consideration has become increasingly serious over the last year.

I am a European …

When the news about Harvey Weinstein first came out, I didn't pay attention. When the news about Louis CK came out, something changed.

I don't know Louie CK, not personally anyway. I've seen his television shows and specials and I've even seen him live. I'm a fan. More than that …

In the last few weeks, I've seen the issue of neurodiversity come up in the BDSM community in ways that give me concern. This post is a rough outline of my feelings on the topic.

I am neurodivergent. What that means specifically is that my neurological makeup is significantly different …