Vir Cotto's BDSM Blog

Why I use simple safewords

Safety signals are very important, especially if you're playing with someone you don't know well.

Not that long ago, someone wanted to do a scene with me and told me her safeword was... I don't actually remember, so let's say it was abrachiocephalia.

"What? I don't know that word." I explained.

she defined it. I said "Okay... But I won't remember that. Do you know "Green", "Yellow", "Red".

She did, so I told her, "Good... So let's use that... and your final safeword for this scene is Red"

She was annoyed. She had a clever, fun, safeword that she liked, but she acquiesced and we used Red.

I used Red not because I don't think that your complex safeword isn't fun and cute, it's that I have a terrible memory. I won't remember it. And if it's a loud environment, I may not even be able to make it out.

If you say "circumlocution" in a club, I may not hear you or understand (especially as I have auditory processing problems in the first place), but "Red" I understand. Red is easy to remember and is easy to hear.

I use simple safewords because I'm a simple guy.

...And I want you to be safe.