Vir Cotto's BDSM Blog

Domly Slave

I have a confession to make to everyone.

Although I identify as a dominant, I am a slave... to my time management system.

Without it, I am a lazy, useless creature. Days can pass by when it seems nothing gets done; I'm treading water. I go through the routine of the day, but when my head hits the pillow, nothing's been accomplished.

But when I follow my system, when I create a daily plan, set out my goals, schedule my time, etc. I'm consistently amazed at how much I get done. Not only have I finished twelve things off my todo list today, but I even had time to write about it!

And that, ultimately, is the point. My domliness doesn't come out of sheer will, nor does it come out of any intrinsic self-discipline. I have to use a process with myself, just as I would with someone else. I have to force myself to schedule time to work, to eat, to rest and to play. I have to challenge myself to do more, to achieve more. I have to be pushing myself, and trust in something larger than myself- the process I use to manage my life and my tasks, because, without it, I'm my own lost little sheep.

And with this in mind, I wonder what, if anything, makes me different than a sub. I think the biggest difference is that I love doing this stuff. I love making lists of tasks, and scheduling. I love setting out the goals and checking to ensure they're done. Maybe in another life, I'd have been a middle manager, but kink provides me that opportunity to express those impulses a healthy way, with floggers and riding crops!

On a serious note- maybe my domly skills would be improved by taking a course in life coaching.